how to have a date with yourself

Manhattan Bridge as seen from Washington Street (Dumbo, Brooklyn). Photo taken March 2007. More photos to come.


1. Begin the day psyching yourself up to tackle your to-do list, which includes catching up on laundry, dishwashing, dusting, and paying bills.

2. Recharge your camera instead. Think of an image within commuting distance you've never been to before. Surf the web for decent maps of that neighborhood. Jot down recommended places to eat. Put on your sneakers.

3. Walk out the door with camera, iPod, ATM card, bus pass, and a magazine to read in case you find yourself on a park bench. Do not bring your cell phone. If you can't leave without it, bring it but turn it off. Leave home your day-to-day bag brimming with crap you don't need.

4. When you arrive at your destination, do not refer to the map you've printed out unless you really have to. Relish in getting lost. Don't forget to hum to yourself.

5. Be utterly present within your body. Take a look around as though you're seeing everything for the first time. You in fact are. Even if you've been there before, the only reality is now, which means the person who saw those sights before is no longer you. If you're having a hard time seeing things without preconceived notions, pretend you have amnesia.

6. When you encounter people who want to talk to you during your walk, and you will, don't be afraid to engage in conversation. Old men, moms with children, tourists... everyone's got a question or a comment. Be compassionate. Loneliness is everywhere, and a few of them will turn out to say something that would be of real help to you. So talk. This rule does not apply to anyone who gives you the creeps. Be friendly, but don't be an idiot.

7. When you sit down for your meal, leave a big tip. Don't ever be cheap. Treat yourself like royalty, which means anyone who has dealings with you is just as blessed. If you end up getting your food at a place without waiter service such as a deli or a pizza joint, eat your food outdoors, on a park bench or stoop. Look up at the clouds while munching.

8. Be trigger happy with your camera. It is okay to take 20 shots of the same object. Who said you can't? Who's the boss of you? No one.

9. Give thanks every now and then. You don't have to say it out loud. Every hour or so, just think it. Say to your heart, say to the world, say to that flower or that fire hydrant, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

10. Let the world open itself. Or rather, let yourself open to it. Every time you're ready to see something beautiful, you most certainly will. It might not happen immediately. It might not even happen that day. But it will, especially with practice. That's a promise.